This Side of Invisible

Fun Facts about Hand-Writing Letters:  Results from several studies have shown that both children and adults learn more and remember better when writing by hand. Now another study confirms the same: choosing handwriting over keyboard use yields the best learning and memory. ( Neuroscience News )  A few experiments have shown that the brain only recognizes symbols that it learned if they were printed by hand, not if they were typed. When we are learning new letters, math symbols, or other symbols, it is much better to print them by hand than to type them. ( Frontiers for Young Minds )  The ability to read cursive matters. As Michel Martin points out on NPR, "many of the most important historical documents in the U.S., everything from the Declaration of Independence to the Bill of Rights, are written in cursive." What happens when we require a translator for our most precious founding documents? ( Treehugger.com )  Writing by hand makes us slow down. When you write b...

In the memorable words of Dr. Ian Malcolm played by the incomprable Jeff Goldblum, "Life finds a way." Even when we don't want it to, when we can't keep up, when we're exhausted... it just keeps coming. Life simply happens. But we must remember that we are created to be agents of action, not simply objects to be acted upon. Life comes at us unbidden, but we too can create the life we want. We can be the life unbidden. Life isn't merely something that happens around us, it's not just a force happening to us. Life happens within us. And with each exhale, we can speak life into existence all around us. We just have to be intentional, choosing moment to moment how to expend our energy. You are a child of God, the Great Creator; the DNA of creation makes up your every molecule. Don't wait to be bidden. Don't wait for approval. Listen to the beating of your own lifeforce. What life will you release into the world today? Now available: Life...

The house is quiet… mostly. Except for the whispers of my boys who are determined not to sleep. Not that I can blame them, there’s a pretty awesome thunderstorm happening right now. I’m sitting in my dark office, watching lightning illuminate the world outside the large picture window. The almost dead, but refusing to die tree in the front yard is rocking rather precariously over my husband’s car. If I close my eyes and listen, I can hear the sophisticated symphony of the storm: wind whooshing, thunder rumbling soft and low in the distance, and rain slapping and tapping and patting the world around me. It’s a lovely lullaby. And yet, I can’t sleep. It's ironic that just a week or so after Bruncle was admitted to a residential treatment facility I was approached about publishing this essay about him. It was almost painful to say "Yes, I'd love to have it published" when it seemed to be null and void. It's not. Not completely anyway, but it felt li...

There are those in the world that caution against looking back.  And I see the wisdom in that counsel... usually.  I understand that dwelling on the past hinders your movement forward.  But here's the thing, these last few days, I've learned the beauty and the value of letting yourself look back. This last weekend was General Conference for our church.  Basically, it's a televised conference (from Salt Lake City) in which our church leaders speak to us.  For those of us fortunate enough to live in areas where we have access to cable, satellite or the internet, it usually means we get to have 10 hours of church in our pajamas :)  For me, this weekend, it meant two days straight of having everyone home and 10 hours of trying to get kids to stay quiet.  It was a glorious, albeit long, weekend. Conference was great.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining in the least about that.  And my kids were great and I love them, sometimes it's actual...

Our brain is a marvelous machine.  For a multitude of reason.  One of the things I find most fascinating is the ability it has to suppress memories.  Yes, this is a true concept.  There is research from  Stanford  that has proven that there is a neurobiological response in the brain that shuts down our ability to retrieve traumatic memories, a type of voluntary forgetfulness.  As it is, I have gaping voids in my childhood memory bank and I am beginning to understand why.  And I can see how my tendency to suppress memories created a void rather than small holes.  As I have worked to resurface suppressed memories (a painful and debilitating process) I have noticed that I have gained a greater capacity for remembering everyday things.  There was once a time when my memory maker was so focused on suppressing that daily life became muted, fuzzy, static that I couldn't remember.  I have decades that passed this way for me, includ...

By now, I'm sure, you've realized that what you stole from me has little to no worldly value.  Of course, you might get a few hundred dollars for the DVDs, iPod, jacket and bag you took, but my scriptures, my journal, my family history research that were in that bag can have little value to anyone but me and my posterity.  Well, maybe that's not exactly true. What if you opened my scriptures and saw the notes in the margins?  Could you feel how much I wanted to be a better mother by all the notes I made regarding parenting? For instance, near Alma 56:48 "And they rehearsed unto me the words of their mothers, saving: We do not doubt our mothers knew it."  I had written in the margins something like "There is no substitute for a righteous mother."  What if you read all the verses I had highlighted and underlined and cross-referenced?  Hopefully, you'd learn how much I valued things like prayer, fasting, family, covenants, and the Savior, Jesus Christ...

Published on the Liahona Project, link here Something I always tell my children: "It's not about you.  It's about what you are doing and how that effects those around you."  Of course, that is the lecture they hear when they are doing things wrong, when they are having a negative effect.  You know, to help them see that they can't just behave like monkeys and do whatever they want.  I have been beating my head against the wall the last few weeks trying to figure out why they aren't getting it.  Today, I had an epiphany. The statement is true.  Even how I am delivering it to them, it is true.  I haven't been mean or fierce or fuming.  My voice is usually at least placid, at best loving.  However, the context is wrong.  The emphasis is misplaced.  Trying to change their negative behavior by pointing out their negative behavior isn't fruitful.  Something that started to pull this together for me was a quote from Elder Dieter ...

We were at Barnes & Noble for a meet and greet with the boys' new k12 teachers and classmates.  The store was a bit chaotic as kids rushed around doing a scavenger hunt that we came in the middle of and my kids weren't interested in anyway.  I waited in line to talk to their teachers and they snuck off into the childrens' section to peruse the books.  I was happy, I was in my element surrounded by books.  And, I love it when they run off searching for books. We stayed until the open house ended.  We didn't win any door prizes, but I had promised to get them each a book as it was also a book fair for the school.  I had explained to them I would get them each something within reason, which I thought was specific enough.  Any parent of a child with ADD, ADHD, OCD or Autism will tell you, you can never be specific enough.  The boys had their hearts set on Lego Ninjago books.  Which were, admittedly, very cool.  They were also $30 a pie...

Published on The Liahona Project, link here Being a mother is hard.  It's mentally and emotionally taxing in unimaginable ways.  Having a child with special needs multiplies the difficulties tenfold.  As the mother of multiple children with special needs... there are many, many days when insanity reigns and tears flow like the River Nile. And I wouldn't have life any other way. As I met with a Parent Advocate today to discuss how to approach the school, and what laws I needed to be aware of, and what jargon I needed to be familiar with and what paperwork I should never give them outright (things I will always need my own copies of), I was so appreciative that someone understands how hard I fight for my children.  How much I love them.  How very much I want what is best for them.  My Parent Advocate was my hero today.  She saw me, a simple mother, that is often overlooked and belittled by professionals, both academic and medical, and she understoo...

I find it a great plan to list something every day this month I'm thankful for, especially when we consider President Monson's comments on the subject: "My brothers and sisters, do we remember to give thanks for the blessings we receive? Sincerely giving thanks not only helps us recognize our blessings, but it also unlocks the doors of heaven and helps us feel God’s love. Gratitude is a divine principle." So for the first 3 days of November, I am grateful for: my husband my children my step stool