I recently (just yesterday) completed a 10 day cleanse the included fasting and drinking lots of lemonade. And I've come to a whole new love for fasting. It's amazing how going without can change your perspective. Not only now does junk food sound completely unappealing it also hurts my tummy on a new level, as I discovered last night when I had 2.5 bites of my daughters birthday cake. Not a great choice of first foods to eat after not eating for 10 days. Now that I've said no to all food for 10 days, I have a new found priority for what goes into my body. Food is in its rightful place again, as fuel. And I'm thinking I now need to apply this principle to other areas of my life. Other areas that are a little out of control and indulgent. Maybe internet use? Possibly, dare I say it, books? And maybe even certain types of music? I just am feeling like I don't want to waste my life on the unessential, I want to fill myself to the brim with things that will actually enhance my being, enlighten me and help me to become the woman I can be, the woman God knows I have potential to become.
I heard those dreaded words today. "I'm afraid that most likely your child doesn't qualify for services anymore." I paused afraid that if I responded too soon I'd yell or cry. I asked a few clarifying questions, blinking back tears of panic. I held my own for nearly the entire conversation. And then the therapist said, "You should be so proud, Mom. He's made so much progress." Then, I cried. The truth is he has made so much progress. The truth is I am very proud of him. Still, the truth is I hate hearing those words. Every time a specialist says to me that one of my children "no longer qualifies" for services, bile-like panic rises in my chest. "But he still has such anger issues," I said. And, "His impulsiveness gets in his way on a daily basis," I added. Doesn't she know? Can't she see the things I see? "I did tell you that he pulled a knife on his brother last week, didn't I?" Somehow she h...
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