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Spin me right 'round baby, 2 steps forward, 2 steps back, walk 5000 miles, do the Hokey Pokey and that's what it's all about.

Do you ever have those moments when you realize you are just a dog chasing your own tail? How about, ever have a moment when the world as you know it falls out from under you, or crumbs around you? Ever thought you were ascending the stairway of heaven and discovered that it's a stair master and you weren't actually going anywhere... and in the meantime you are sweating to death and your thighs are on fire? Yeah, I have those moments a lot.

Life is just disgustingly hard sometimes, isn't it? Murphy and his notorious law--"If anything can go wrong, it will"--follow me everywhere... even in my sleep. Now I don't want to sound like a total cynic, but it truly has been my experience that, "If everything seems to be going well, you obviously don't know what the hell is going on." Thanks again, Murphy, you're awesome.

There are times when I feel like Alice in Wonderland, befuddled and confused, falling through a never-ending hole, never sure of my own size or capabilities, running from one trap to another, trying to keep my head attached. At times I am Cinderella, working unceasingly at menial tasks, wearing my fingers to the bone scrubbing old stains that just won't come out; and not just cleaning up my own messing either, but several other peoples too. Other times, I feel like Ariel, unsteady on my own legs and constantly searching for a way to communicate what's really going on.

Let's be honest: This is what we all want.
That 'dream journey' that ends in a "Happily Ever After".
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Now, let's be a little more honest:  We all have days when this is how we feel...
lost, tired, pathetic and like we aren't getting anywhere.
Remember the Normal post?
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Super honesty:  We all have days when the only thing that sees us through is a bit of silliness.
Remember the self-medicating post?
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A while back, I read something that helped me put things into perspective and gave me a second wind in this megathlon we call life.

"For a moment, think back about your favorite fairy tale. In that story the main character may be a princess or a peasant; she might be a mermaid or a milkmaid, a ruler or a servant. You will find one thing all have in common: they must overcome adversity.

"Cinderella has to endure her wicked stepmother and evil stepsisters. She is compelled to suffer long hours of servitude and ridicule.

"In “Beauty and the Beast,” Belle becomes a captive to a frightful-looking beast in order to save her father. She sacrifices her home and family, all she holds dear, to spend several months in the beast’s castle.

"In the tale “Rumpelstiltskin,” a poor miller promises the king that his daughter can spin straw into gold. The king immediately sends for her and locks her in a room with a mound of straw and a spinning wheel. Later in the story she faces the danger of losing her firstborn child unless she can guess the name of the magical creature who helped her in this impossible task.

"In each of these stories, Cinderella, Belle, and the miller’s daughter have to experience sadness and trial before they can reach their “happily ever after.” Think about it. Has there ever been a person who did not have to go through his or her own dark valley of temptation, trial, and sorrow?

"Sandwiched between their “once upon a time” and “happily ever after,” they all had to experience great adversity. Why must all experience sadness and tragedy? Why could we not simply live in bliss and peace, each day filled with wonder, joy, and love?

"In stories, as in life, adversity teaches us things we cannot learn otherwise. Adversity helps to develop a depth of character that comes in no other way. Our loving Heavenly Father has set us in a world filled with challenges and trials so that we, through opposition, can learn wisdom, become stronger, and experience joy."  (Dieter F. Uchtdorf, Your Happily Ever After, 2010)


HOLY LIGHT BULB, BATMAN!!! Seriously. Is it any wonder I feel like a tortured fairy tale princess? They did have their fair share, or more, of trials, heartache, evil stepmothers (yes, I've had a beast of one myself), and... happily ever afters. So I have to ask myself a question: where's mine? Where is my happily ever after? News Flash--My prince has come. I live in a beautiful country. I have four beautiful, quirky, bayonet-flinging, bb shooting children that I get to be at home with and raise and teach (plus one great half-brother who I adore and admire). This is my happily ever after. The key is happily; it never says, "They lived a problem-free ever after" or "They lived in a peaceful, joy-bubble ever after." They lived happily, for the rest of their days. These women got what they wished for and they were happy with it. And so am I. At least, that's what I keep telling myself.

Comments

Unknown said…
You (and Pres. Uchtdorf) put into words what has been on my mind lately. Thanks!!
Laura said…
Miranda - you nailed it! I love you and your thoughts so much. When I can't sleep, I read your blog. And I swear we are living parallell lives hundreds of miles apart. The biggest difference is that you have a gift of being able to put it all into words and I just sit and stew on mine. Maybe there is a lesson there - I should start writing, and maybe then I will understand myself. I love you and your little band of craziness. I have my little herd of misfits too and your words make me feel like this might actually be normal...scary thought... Thank you for using your talents to bless my life.
Great minds, think alike, ladies! Laura, I'm sure we have parallel lives... I wish we could get all our crazies together.

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