Sunday, December 8, 2013

things as they really are

There is verse of scripture that reads:  "for the Spirit speaketh the truth and lieth not. Wherefore, it speaketh of things as they really are, and of things as they really will be; wherefore, these things are manifested unto us plainly, for the salvation of our souls." (Jacob 4:13)  And this morning as I lounged in my bed, refusing to get out from under my down comforter, there was a bit of truth running around in my head.  A touch of something as it really is that has been nagging at me and, finally, I was able to give it a name.


Wait.  What?

That's right, I'm talking about romance.  Can the Spirit teach us about such things?  Certainly.

You see, I posted this to facebook two nights ago:  

"Writing poetry by firelight. My world is rather romantic.
Or it would be if boys weren't having a bionicle war at my feet, 
the laundry from winter ice storm adventures wasn't piling up
 and dear husband wasn't asking for dinner."

It was funny and cute... at least I thought so.  And it wasn't truly a complaint, just a statement of fact.  I didn't mean to suggest that I didn't love hearing my boys play war games without end... someday, I'll miss all those machine-gun and bomb-explosion sound effects.  I didn't want to suggest that I begrudge the housework I do as a stay-at-home mother... I'm actually incredibly grateful to have the option to stay home, to build my home, it's a rarity in today's world and on our economy.  And I would be heartsick to think my husband thought I despised taking care of him, or his children... I actually thrive on it.  I feel the happiest when I am taking care of my little flock.  I guess that's why something underneath this little bit of sarcasm has been nagging at me and prompting me to come clean.

See the truth is, real romance accounts for menial everyday tasks, the ever-present background noise of children and the constant necessity of setting aside one's own self interest.

Isn't that why we love to watch romance movies and read romantic novels?  Isn't that what makes our hearts flutter with anticipation of onscreen kisses?  

My favorite love/romance story: Jane Eyre.

Even in Hollywood, romance involves hardships to overcome, comical everyday mishaps, painful heartbreak and frustrating misunderstandings.  Romance isn't this magical fairy tale realm where nothing ever goes wrong and the hero and heroine's every whim is fulfilled.  In fact, fairy tales are fraught with strife: wicked stepmothers or witches, fearsome creatures that steal your happiness in the night, the nasty, hurtful negative consequences of someone else's choices, pitfalls and traps, snares even that sing to our weakest characteristics and call them to the surface.   Sounds a bit like real life doesn't it?

Marriage is hard.  Relationships are hard, both romantic and platonic, familial and friend.  These things try us to our limits and they require constant effort and this dreaded thing called work.  No one ever reached a happily ever after without intense trials and callus-creating work first.  I wrote a blog post on a similar vein to this quite some time ago... you can read it here.  I also recently wrote a post about my husband because the world's view on men seems a bit skewed too... you can read that one here.

The bottom line is this: Romance, no matter how the dictionary, nor man or woman defines it, is, in fact, nothing more than the knowledge that, at the end of the day both despite and because of whatever has gone wrong, you are loved and that you love in return.

So the truth is, my life is very romantic.  

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